Relationships>

#167380 55 Wed Sep 28 08:26:02 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
sounds like some of the usual happenings that have been happening recently, even I think I'm going to hang it up trying to explain if it isn't understood, it isn't understood a waste of keying in words, esp. in e-mail and face-to-face? easier to just shut my trap and hose-off but someone that understands could be neet
#167470 55 Thu Sep 29 03:30:49 1994 [Violent screaming] szNeonx [electric death!] @ The Asylum, Seattle, U.S.A.
Understood.
#167471 55 Thu Sep 29 09:06:11 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
hmm... neet
#167628 55 Fri Sep 30 04:05:41 1994 [Here comes] ZooKeeper [must be feeding time again...] @ The Zoo, Bellingham, USA/WA/WHATCOM
Oh My GOD, I just understood a JayDee post. does that make me neet? or crazy? or just sleep deprived? looking at the time on this post... need I wonder further? or wander further? nevermind...
#167692 55 Fri Sep 30 10:00:54 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
hm..
#167843 55 Sat Oct 1 01:06:04 1994 Torch Song @ Twilight Voice, South Wall, Up North, US/WA/WHATCOM
Sis...all of the above apply but all it really makes you is perceptive as usual...
#167895 55 Sat Oct 1 10:58:33 1994 [He is not a bear!] FuzzyWuzzy [He's a Sysop] @ Line NoiZe, Ferndale, U.S.A.
JayDee > I understand it too much, either way you lose!
#167896 55 Sat Oct 1 11:34:57 1994 [No more words] ZooKeeper [No more promises...] @ The Zoo, Bellingham, USA/WA/WHATCOM
*giggle*
#167955 55 Sat Oct 1 14:24:26 1994 JayDee @ Loka, Seattle
no there is no concept of "loss", once things are "right" it is getting the "head in the right place" that is the goal... no one loses no one hurts
#168602 55 Mon Oct 3 19:24:02 1994 [No more words] ZooKeeper [No more promises...] @ The Zoo, Bellingham, USA/WA/WHATCOM
gee, thanks sis. :>
#168963 55 Tue Oct 4 18:19:05 1994 Torch Song @ Twilight Voice, South Wall, Up North, US/WA/WHATCOM
"no one loses no one hurts" sure wish I lived in the same world you're in, JayDee...
#168964 55 Tue Oct 4 23:05:52 1994 [No more words] ZooKeeper [No more promises...] @ The Zoo, Bellingham, USA/WA/WHATCOM
you do. or at least, you did. nevermind.
#169289 55 Tue Oct 4 23:29:38 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
I'm not there, TS... I'm not there... it is a Dream, tho, and I think it will become True someday... god, but I have lived in some "different worlds" there were losses people cried but, I wouldn't have changed it that much, or steered-away, had I known I wouldn't have felt the things I did I wouldn't feel the things that I have, and will... but, there is a pair of events I will never forget MimiMaria crying, and being held by SylviaLouise Sylvia holding her and saying "god, now I know why you love her so..." many years later, when the fact Sylvia had left hit-home Maria burst into tears she cried when her lady left... but there was just no other way...
#169539 55 Wed Oct 5 18:58:50 1994 Ruadh @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
There's an ongoing debate on the BBS at work about what committment means in relationships. The usual stuff was aired about "Thou shalt not commit adultery" and the opposing view, which is that it's nobody's business but that of the people involved. Silly. I asked, is it infidelity if your partner agrees to and/or participates in it? I'm waiting to see what kind of silly furor this stirs up. (Last week we had a furious debate between two women over whether one should or should not shave one's legs. Never mind the fact that this, too, is a personal matter, not a matter of "shoulds" and "should nots." It's entertaining, anyways.
#169540 55 Wed Oct 5 20:21:41 1994 Lady Non Sequitur @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
I believe in Thou Shalt Commit Adultery (with Thy Spouse's/SO's Knowledge and Consent) ... course it's not infidelity, specially if the spouse is also involved <G> ... although I also believe in the 11th Commandment, Thou Shalt Not Shave Thy Neighbor's Wife's Legs... (although Thou Mayst Shave Thy Neighbor's, if Thy Likes)
#170244 55 Thu Oct 6 06:13:46 1994 doctor doom @ Saint Dismas' Infirmary, Takoma No Nuke Park, MD, US/MD/PEOPLES' REPUBLIC
Yeah, but it's without the spouses' knowledge or consent that it becomes a problem. Anyone who does that is hurting someone for their own selfish gratification. And I also might add that in a lot of cases, "consent" is granted grudgingly and only as an alternative to losing the person all together, which means the pain drags on indefinitely.
#170245 55 Thu Oct 6 07:05:57 1994 Buster Hymen @ Saint Dismas' Infirmary, Takoma No Nuke Park, MD, US/MD/PEOPLES' REPUBLIC
^^What he said. Also, in general, infidelity with or without spousal consent, is for the weak. If you wanted to fuck other people, you shouldn't have gotten married. If you're a "swinger," you're just a fuck-up who wouldn't know the meaning of the word commitment anyway -- the only commitment you can make is one to your own gratification. That's fine, but don't lie and say you can make other commitments.
#170243 55 Thu Oct 6 07:52:54 1994 Masc @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
Hmm.. I can see five sides to the extra-SO relationship relationship. 1: The Person in the rel. that finds some one else. 2: The other partner. 3: The person the rel. is had with. 4: Close friend of the "Have-r" 5: Close friend of the "Have-Not" I've been, I think, in all five positions, and haven't seen the extra relationship add much unless the original relationship wsa dead or dying. On the other hand, if one pertner needs to add something to the relationship, perhaps that is an issue that needs to be dealt with.
#170246 55 Thu Oct 6 09:49:24 1994 Lady Non Sequitur @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
Buster, if you think commitment is just about who you sleep with, you don't know what commitment is. Sex is extraneous, IMO. I've known monogamous people who were completely uncommitted and swingers (your word, I never like it myself) who were far more committed to each other than people who have been married 20 years ...
#169615 55 Thu Oct 6 14:10:59 1994 Torch Song @ Twilight Voice, South Wall, Up North, US/WA/WHATCOM
Nope, I *thought* I lived in that world, sis... Then I lost...and got hurt...for nothing...
#170247 55 Thu Oct 6 14:35:45 1994 doctor doom @ Saint Dismas' Infirmary, Takoma No Nuke Park, MD, US/MD/PEOPLES' REPUBLIC
I tend to agree with Buster. Marriage is about commitment, fidelity, heterosexuality, and children. If you're not ready for those things, don't get married.
#169909 55 Thu Oct 6 23:26:59 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
I fucked up bad I developed a case of displaced agression... the one I wanted to kick-ass on wasn't avaiable... so I lashed-out at the closest to-me...it was insane... she took weird shit for a year and then she couldn't take it anymore I didn't know and I have had my ass subjected to the same kicking, too and it won't stop, because the true target is out-of reach I can't fix it, either unconscious displaced agression is horrid killer shit don't let it happen to you, either way...
#170248 55 Fri Oct 7 05:49:04 1994 Masc @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
Having had two tries, my opinion on marriage is founded on experiance. It is for people to form legal bond, hopefully an amplification of an already exiting emotional bond. the continuation of family/tribal values is *strengthened* by marriage, marriage doesn't replace it. Nor is it necessarily about children. Many couples are chosing childlessness, and are still content in marriage. It boils down to a taking a further step in the relationship you are in.
#169940 55 Fri Oct 7 08:43:59 1994 Mina @ The Asylum, Seattle, U.S.A.
I hold a middle of the road view. If both people consent to committing adultry, that is their business. But if one of them holds the commandment seriously, the other should respect that, or find someone else.
#170249 55 Fri Oct 7 17:13:28 1994 Lady Non Sequitur @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
I'm not even gonna enter into the logical argument at this point. If that's what you believe, nothing I say's gonna change your minds. Go be heterosexual and monogamous. Maybe when the divorce rate drops below 45% I'll believe you. until that point don't pass judgement on my lifestyle, especially if you haven't tried it *and succeeded*. Trying it and failing is no basis for comparison. Crankily signing off, Lady Non.
#170250 55 Fri Oct 7 17:45:14 1994 uncle herb ['erblink 202.667.7335] @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
The only reason marriage exists as a legal entity with accompanying tax and other incentives is to encourage a stable environment in which to build a family -- the most basic building block of a healthy society. If people get married for other goals than heterosexual family-building, that's fine -- but it shouldn't be legally sanctioned, and there shouldn't be the financial breaks.
#170251 55 Fri Oct 7 18:29:33 1994 Saint Bob @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
How come? What's the difference?
#170257 55 Fri Oct 7 20:05:11 1994 Frunobula X [hates you.] @ Saint Dismas' Infirmary, Takoma No Nuke Park, MD, US/MD/PEOPLES' REPUBLIC
Suckle upon my blood-sausage, you emaciated semi-wog.
#170258 55 Fri Oct 7 21:18:55 1994 doctor doom @ Saint Dismas' Infirmary, Takoma No Nuke Park, MD, US/MD/PEOPLES' REPUBLIC
I'd rather die, you foreheadless maladroit.
#170252 55 Sat Oct 8 03:31:42 1994 Masc @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
Hmm.. If it were only for strengthening God's way of living, then it would only be a religious ceremony with no legel implications, and also an infringement on the supposed seperation of church and state. Marriage has a lot going for it, but you gotta realize each marrige is a union of those two unique people. As for the heterosexuality issue, it's relativy simple to resolve. I personally feel a homosexual relationship is wrong; but my opinions don't dictate societies norms. Marriage, in society, is a legal union, so the law and the church (and my opinion) must stay seperate. Besides, too many churchy folk use the excuse of condemming the lifestyle of homosexuality to condem the people themselves, which IS wrong-according to the same book they get the dislike of homosexuals from! So St. Bob, you darned lezzie you, I love you anyway (G). :)
#170253 55 Sat Oct 8 05:48:10 1994 uncle herb ['erblink 202.667.7335] @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
Bob, I'm just trying to offend Torso.
#170254 55 Sat Oct 8 17:17:59 1994 Saint Bob @ Desolation Row, Baltimore, MD, US/MD/BALT
Oh. Sorry, herb, didn't mean to intrude. Masc: You can't call me a lesbian until you've seen the light.
#170255 55 Sat Oct 8 22:41:53 1994 Masc @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
If I saw the light, it would shine offa your cute butt!(G)
#170256 55 Sat Oct 8 22:52:55 1994 uncle herb ['erblink 202.667.7335] @ Outsider's, Takoma Park, MD, US/MD/MONTGOMERY
No problem, Bob. Besides, after tonight, I've decided to unilaterally enter a peace treaty with Torso. Hear that, Torso? I will not engage in any more bashing or deliberate inflamational attempts unless provoked. I do, however, reserve my right to contrary opinions expressed in a civil manner. The rest is up to you.
#171701 55 Thu Oct 13 06:07:01 1994 [Just call me] Megamol [@ tellagraph hill] @ Tellagraph Hill, Seattle
grapenavel?????hmm....
#171702 55 Thu Oct 13 08:40:28 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
what a bizarre relationship...
#171703 55 Thu Oct 13 09:31:42 1994 [Just call me] Megamol [@ tellagraph hill] @ Tellagraph Hill, Seattle
no doubt about it!!!!
#171704 55 Thu Oct 13 14:46:57 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
what?
#171705 55 Thu Oct 13 17:42:00 1994 [Just call me] Megamol [@ tellagraph hill] @ Tellagraph Hill, Seattle
It
#172948 55 Mon Oct 17 22:52:32 1994 [
3
eLook at that
0] Black Wolf [
3
gcaught a rabbit.
0] @ Black Mountain, Kendall, US/WA/Whatcom
yup
#173188 55 Tue Oct 18 05:38:33 1994 JayDee @ Loka, sea
bazz is better whoop (da butt)
#173189 55 Tue Oct 18 09:01:01 1994 [Just call me] Megamol [@ tellagraph hill] @ Tellagraph Hill, Seattle
told ya!!
Relationships> _